The labor horror stories are something usually saved for the first timer. Friends and neighbors will come from miles around to share their labor and delivery stories. The truth of the matter is that most women, deliver their children without any kind of complications at all. I mean, there are kids running wild around the continent of Africa and they do not have any difficulty getting those kids out. So, why is it that women in more capable countries have that urge to terrify a first timer? I have a few theories…
1. They really don’t remember their labor and delivery. They were so drugged up that any story they have was relayed second hand by their husband or partner who had to witness it. It’s always worse coming from the person witnessing it. That poor husband is helpless and terrified and doesn’t have a clue as to how to soothe his wife’s intense (but normal) pain. You can never trust the story relayed by the husband, it’s tainted because she made him cry. I’d say this probably applies to about 60% of horror stories.
2. Some doctors really are on crack.
3. Sometimes babies don’t come out facing the right way. Sometimes the epidural doesn’t work. Sometimes the C-Section scar doesn’t heal correctly. Sometimes that baby screams for 6 days straight. If all of those things are a possibility then they are ALL normal. Bending and twisting them into a story that terrifies the new mother-to-be is only entertaining for the story-teller.
4. Maybe the story-teller really hates that poor girl she’s telling the story to. Maybe she holds a grudge and this is just one special way to inflict some pain. People are mean, watch out for that.
Whatever the reason, it’s always important to remember that the person sharing his/her horror story truly thinks that their contribution is interesting. It is the pregnant woman’s job to tell them otherwise. I suggest a soft and subtle “If you don’t shut up, I’m going to throw a knuckle sandwich your way.” It’s worked for me in the past and you can always blame it on the hormones later.
Amen! I hate hearing the horror stories!And as soon as they realize your pregnant they always have something to say. It gets old. What I really hate is when the old people make you feel like a baby for wanting drugs. You know how they say they delivered a 20 pounder upside down, backwards and inside out while riding the horse to the local drs office. Yeah Youhad it rough, and Im spoiled because they use clean utensils...poor you...lol
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